So you have just received a promotion at work! Congratulations! It may be tempting to share your good news with friends, family and loved ones, but everything you have to share is not intended for everyone to hear.
Whether it’s a promotion at work, baby on the way, or the reuniting with a long lost love, when it comes to sharing your good news every listening ear has a level of readiness to receive. I’d like to introduce you to what I call the zone of proximal readiness. You can use this zone to determine to what extent a person is best ready to celebrate the good news with you.
To understand this idea, let’s explore a concept known throughout the field of education as the Zone of Proximal Development (ZPD). The “zone” is the space between where you can perform a task on your own, and where you can do something only with guidance. The ZPD is an indicator about what a person is ready to learn, based on what they already know.
Your zone of proximal development is the place where learning something new for you feels just right — it’s not too difficult that you are frustrated, and it’s not so easy that you are not growing. The reason learning feels appropriate in your zone is because you bring a certain amount of knowledge and experience to the new learning. You’re able to use what you know to learn what you don’t know.
Just as there is the Zone of Proximal Development for learning, I’d like to propose that there is also a zone of proximal engagement, or the space indicating a person’s readiness to converse on a subject. The zone is the intersection between experiences and beliefs as it relates to a particular topic.
Experiences teach people how to navigate situations. They also help people form opinions in order to establish what they believe to be true. Talking with someone who is in your zone of proximal engagement feels good, and it’s a conversation you want to continue.
Let's go back to where we started in this article. You have just received a promotion at work! You share the news with your cousin who happens to be in the zone intersecting her three year unemployment streak (experience) with her pessimism about the job market (belief).
Why isn't your cousin isn't ready to hear about your good news? How can you find the right people to share it with? Discover the answer in the full article in my column at PracticalWisdomThatWorks, a place where you can learn about how to apply Spiritual Laws to your life, and access tools to further your evolution.
We are in the winter holiday season in the United States, which means a lot of gathering among co-workers, colleagues, friends and family. Many people will catch up with others and share good news, all in the spirit of love and good intentions. However, the holiday times can trigger feelings of pain and sadness when someone has experienced a loss. Job layoffs, missing holiday bonuses, and not being able to take time off work to be with loved ones are a few sources of pain when it comes to work.
When you’re in pain, whether physical, financial or emotional, it seems as if all of your senses focus solely on the discomfort. You feel it intensely; the pain can be triggered by things you hear, and you want nothing more than to see a pain-free existence. To quote an empathic writer, pain for pain’s sake is cruel.
Rather than dwell on the pain, choose to be in it and acknowledge that your pain really does exist — it exists to help you grow. There is a lesson behind the pain that, when learned, makes the journey to pleasure bearable and even a bit enjoyable. Shifting your perspective is one way that you can elevate your pain to pleasure.
Read more about this strategy of shifting your perspective in my full article here at PracticalWisdomThatWorks, a place where you can learn about how to apply Spiritual Laws to your life, and access tools to further your evolution.
Blogs by Fenesha
Fenesha is a personal growth and professional development specialist who helps people navigate difficult topics with ease.